WEEK 5:

Family Relations

Marriage Preparation

"And one good yardstick as to whether a person might be the right one for you is this: in her presence, do you think your noblest thoughts, do you aspire to your finest deeds, do you wish you were better than you are?"

- President Ezra Taft Benson, "To the Single Adult Brethren of the Church," (Links to an external site.) April 1988.

M. Scott Peck said, “One result of the mysterious nature of love is that no one has ever, to my knowledge, arrived at a truly satisfactory definition of love. In an effort to explain it, therefore, love has been divided into various categories: eros, philia, agape; perfect love and imperfect love, and so on. I am presuming, however, to give a single definition of love, again with the awareness that it is likely to be in some way or ways inadequate. I define love thus: The will to extend one’s self for the purpose of nurturing one’s own or another’s spiritual growth” (The Road Less Traveled, 1978, p. 81)

What do you think of this definition of love? How does this compare and contrast to more commonly held definitions of love? Does this sort of love apply to the process of loving another with the hope or desire to form a lasting marital relationship?

After considering different theories of family and addressing cultural and gender factors influencing family experience, we move more directly to the formation of a family. We begin with how we prepare for and establish marriage relationships. It would be easy to gloss over these important topics, but it would be a great mistake to rely only upon your current skills and knowledge sets while making martial decisions.

“Marriage is perhaps the most vital of all the decisions and has the most far-reaching effects, for it has to do not only with immediate happiness but eternal joy as well. It affects not only the two people involved but their families and particularly their children and their children’s children down through the many generations.” (Spencer W. Kimball, 1976, Marriage and Divorce, 2)


  1. What are some red flags that people often ignore when dating? What are the best ways to deal with red flags? (A favorite quote from a student, "Red flags in dating become flaming billboards in marriage!")
  2. What if you see red flags in someone else's relationship? (A roommate, best friend, son, daughter, sister, brother, etc.)?
  3. What are the best ways to prepare for marriage?
  4. How can we make sure we find the "right one"?
  5. How can we know if we should marry a certain person?

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