Parenting Week 13
GOALS:
RE-READ The Three R's of Choice by Pres. Monson
, "Resources For Hope & Healing," (Accessible - "Resources for Hope & Healing" 
) with resources (sacred and secular) that they work with or know personally that are quite effective. Feel free to browse it if you would like.
read, "Eight Strategies to Help Children Reject Pornography," published in the August 2017 Ensign.
*LOOK INTO...The organization that produced the video above, Educate Empower Kids
, is a fantastic resource for learning how to talk to children about sex, intimacy, and pornography. At their site you can find a three-book series titled 30 Days of Sex TalksElder M. Russell Ballard taught the why, what, and how of family councils in his talk, "Family Councils." You are welcome to study the talk, but for this lesson, you will only be required to study this short article titled: "Beginner's Guide to Family Councils." Look for parallels to Kohn's chapter Choices For Children
>Read Screen Time Contracts
. You may notice that this idea is a potential application of the principles we just explored in W13 Study #1: Choices for Children. After reading up on the concept of contracts, go to the Screenager blog and find another article that most interests you as a parent (or potential parent). Many of these blog posts are evidenced-based and can be quite useful. Go to Research to find a list of resources and organizations that do research in this area.*READ "Be Still, and Know That I Am God
," Elder M. Russell BallardCarefully study, "Things As They Really Are" and consider these questions:
Does the use of various technologies and media invite or impede the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost in your life?
Does the time you spend using various technologies and media enlarge or restrict your capacity to live, to love, and to serve in meaningful ways?
From Elder Dallin H. Oaks' talk "Good, Better, Best":
...Surfing the Internet is not better than serving the Lord or strengthening the family. Some young men and women are skipping Church youth activities or cutting family time in order to … pursue various entertainments. Some young people are amusing themselves to death—spiritual death.”
REMEMBER:
>One of the best defenses to pornography is a good offense with intimacy. But this alone won't be enough.
It's important to know that when a child lives in a home where a parent is consuming pornography, the child encounters the following risks:
- Decreased parental time, attention, and affection.
- Increased risk of encountering pornographic material.
- Increased risk of further separation and divorce.
- Increased risk of the parent losing their job and financial strain.
the three areas that suffer the most from our constant technology use are:
- Learning.
- Relationships.
- Revelation.
four different levels of involvement with pornography: (1) inadvertent exposure, (2) occasional use, (3) intensive use, and (4) compulsive use (addiction).
- Inadvertent Exposure. I believe that everyone has been inadvertently exposed to pornography. There is no sin in this when we turn away and don’t pursue it. It is like a mistake which calls for correction rather than repentance.
- Occasional Use. This use of pornography may be occasional or even frequent, but it is always intentional, and that is its evil.
Pornography stirs and magnifies powerful sexual feelings. The Creator gave us these feelings for His wise purposes, but He also gave commandments that limited their expression to a man and a woman who are married. Pornography debases appropriate sexual expression and encourages the expression of sexual feelings outside the boundaries of marriage. Those who use pornography are trifling with forces so powerful that they can create life or destroy it. Don’t go there!
The danger with any intentional use of pornography, no matter how casual or infrequent, is that it always invites more frequent exposure, which will inevitably increase preoccupation with sexual feelings and behavior. Scientists have discovered that sexual images produce chemicals in the brain that reward sexual feelings, which then encourage more attention to sexual behavior. Immoral sexual behavior of any kind or degree produces feelings of shame, which, over time, can be entrenched within an individual. - Intensive Use. Repeated intentional use of pornography can make its use a habit, 'a behavior pattern regularly followed until it has become almost involuntary.' With habitual use, individuals experience a need for more stimulus to have the same reaction in order to be satisfied.
- Compulsive Use (Addiction). A person’s behavior is addictive when it forms a 'dependency' (a medical term applied to the use of drugs, alcohol, compulsive gambling, etc.) amounting to an 'irresistible compulsion' that 'takes priority over almost everything else in life.'"
"Let There Be Light!" Elder Quentin L. Cook said:
"While our primary effort must be to seek light and truth, we would be wise to black out from our homes the lethal bombs that destroy spiritual development and growth. Pornography, in particular, is a weapon of mass moral destruction. Its impact is at the forefront in eroding moral values. Some TV programs and Internet sites are equally lethal. These evil forces remove light and hope from the world. The level of decadence is accelerating. If we do not black out evil from our homes and lives, do not be surprised if devastating moral explosions shatter the peace which is the reward for righteous living. Our responsibility is to be in the world but not of the world."
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